I have work to do today. My duty, as a matter of fact.

I make my way to the platform, joining the other commuters. We wait for the train.

I join them in their vacant stares, looking at points that don’t exist.

My face is blank but my fingers are alive as I lift purses from bags too surprised to shut their mouths.

I know who to relieve of their burdens.

It’s in their stance and clothing.

The rich ones don’t want all this extra stuff. They look so overwhelmed by their material possessions already.

And I’m happy to oblige.

Later, I will use whatever cash I’ve collected to buy some bourbon.

And watch some TV.

If they only knew that it was I, who cleansed their souls and lightened their burdens, they would thank me.


Real Toads – The Unreliable Narrator